The Latest News Divorce

This article speaks to the historic belief that 50% of all marriages end up in divorce.  Some of those statistics are changing, partially due to fewer people getting married in the first place, as well as people waiting to get married as older/more mature adults, with the results being their marriages tend not to end up in divorce.  An interesting statistic in this article was that the children of divorce who get married are twice as likely to get divorced rather than those raised in an intact family, and if both parties to that marriage are the children of divorce, then their marriages are three times more likely to end in divorce than those of persons coming from an intact marriage family.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Terry Gaspard, YourTango(dot)com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of Pixabay

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 35 Years.

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While this particular article does not address the specifics for a New York divorce (there is no Summary Divorce and no Arbitration for divorce in NY), it does outline the nine different types of divorce, depending upon how complicated the situation is.

Contested & Uncontested:  To obtain a divorce you must commence a lawsuit or "action" against your spouse for divorce.  If that action moves forward where the spouse or "parties" fight over every issue that must be decided in a divorce (distribution of marital assets, child custody and visitation, etc.), then this is a contested divorce.  An uncontested divorce is where the parties settle their lawsuit, or even better, use alternative methods wherein they reach an agreement on all issues before they even file for their divorce, and then these parties DO NOT step into the courthouse...instead their paperwork goes to court.

What are the alternative methods?

Mediation is a process in which an impartial third party meets with a couple to help them reach a mutual and informed agreement for the terms of their separation and/or divorce.  https://www.spiriolaw.com/Practice-Areas/Divorce-Mediation-Long-Island

In the Collaborative Process the attorneys and parties agree that they will not go to Court and will instead focus their energies on settlement. The parties can therefore control certain aspects of their divorce or dissolution, such as the cost and the timing.  https://www.spiriolaw.com/Practice-Areas/Collaborative-Law-Attorney-Long-Island

New York is now a No-Fault Divorce state, which means you do not have to allege or prove fault grounds in your action to obtain a divorce.

Finally, same sex marriage is now legal nationwide and divorce is governed by state law.

Selected excerpt(s), photo and linked article courtesy of PRFIRE.

How to protect your money before marriage...

First, you want to protect individual assets and income, especially if there are multiple streams of income.  This may include income as a result of a family trust, gifts and/or inheritances or separate incomes from different business ventures.  This principle also applies to your non-high net worth individuals that may have multiple sources of income, whether it be from more than one business or a passive stream of income or individual separate property.

Meeting with a Financial Planner is also highly recommended so that you have an understanding of what you want to accomplish with respect to your Estate Planning.  It will also give a perspective with respect to tax consequences based upon your decisions.  After you have sorted out most of these issues, the most important next step is to consider doing a Prenuptial Agreement or a "Prenup".  This legal contract between the parties before they marry sets forth how they intend to hold and divide property that becomes marital and what properties they intend to keep separate and for which their soon to be spouse will have no future claim.  Because this is a contract between two parties, each party should be represented by independent counsel, so that each party's best interests are represented.  In addition to securing and identifying income and assets and how they will be effective by a possible future divorce, it is also important to consider if one of the parties is giving up a career in order to raise a family.  If that is the case, then the Agreement should also take into consideration whether that person is entitled to and should have financial support in the form of maintenance, which is equivalent to spousal support - and for what period of time that support should exist in the event of a divorce.

Another point most couples do not consider in planning for the future and protecting against a possible divorce is what happens to the debt that is acquired during the course of the marriage, or if a party is coming into a marriage with substantial debt...that is something that also should be addressed in a Prenup.

As for celebrities or persons of notoriety who live in the public eye, there are other considerations to ensure with respect to that person's public reputation and the effects that a scandal of a divorce could have.

Selected excerpt(s), photo and linked article courtesy of Sarah Wells, Business Insider, and pitbull2013 via Compfight cc.

People have a lot of concerns about Facebook, from selling private information to online stalking, but one of the issues that has become very apparent is the increase deterioration to marital relationships as a result of Facebook activity, and in some instances, being a direct cause of a divorce.

As this article demonstrates, it is not surprising that one of the primary reasons is inappropriate messages by a spouse to someone other than their spouse, whether it be sexual or flirty comments; these things are often available for anyone to see, which is why it often causes a problem for the marital relationship. 

Word of caution: never put in a text, tweet or on Facebook something that you would not repeat to your mother, or in this case, say in front of your spouse to the person you are speaking to.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Amanda Chatel, yourtango(dot)com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of Pixabay

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 35 Years.

#Concetta #ConcettaSpirio #ConcettaLaw #SpirioLaw #Marriage #Divorce #RealEstate #Litigation #Wills #Trusts #Estates #Mediation #CollaborativeDivorce #LongIsland #Suffolk #Nassau #Islip #Sayville #LGBT

Most people don’t know, but this past January 10^th was “Divorce Day”.  Typically, January sees an increase in divorce because most people decided to wait for the holidays to be over and to start the new year off by moving forward in a different direction.  In 2021, we saw two big celebrity divorces:  Adele, whose comeback album’s major theme was about the dissolution of her marriage, and Kim & Kanye's mega public dissolution of their relationship.

Although divorce is often depicted as something tragic and life altering, and while the pain of the dissolution of a primary relationship is usually evident for most couples, it appears that it's clear that leaving behind a relationship that isn’t good for you can only be a positive thing.  It is a chance for someone to reclaim time and reach better emotional and mental health. 

The landscape of relationships and marriage and divorce has changed.  Studies have shown that the “Millennials” are more cautious and are less likely to get married in the first place compared to other generations.  This article cites a 2018 US Study that suggested 46% of people from 25 to 37 were married, compared to 57% of “Gen X” and 67% of early “Boomers” at that same age.  According to this article, the Millennials have changed attitudes about marriage and divorce.  It is almost as if the younger generation has accepted divorce as a more than possible outcome.  They don’t look at a person who is divorced in such a negative fashion, but rather that they are free of something that wasn’t good for them.  They are also more easily and frequently supportive, offer words of encouragement, and believe that love can be found again.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Megan Wallace, Cosmopolitan(dot)com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of UnSplash

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 34 Years.

#Concetta #ConcettaSpirio #ConcettaLaw #SpirioLaw #Marriage #Divorce #RealEstate #Litigation #Wills #Trusts #Estates #Mediation #CollaborativeDivorce #LongIsland #Suffolk #Nassau #Islip #Sayville #LGBT

Welcome back to the Collaborative Circle, and our first YouTube Video of 2021!

There are obviously worse things that can happen in a relationship than having a heated argument with your significant other, especially if there is a chance of making things better or learning from each other.  But there should be rules to fighting and arguing, whether spoken or unspoken. 

In 1980, two Dutch scholars developed some simple rules that can help.  This article also focuses on what fallacies to avoid using.  When I looked through these, what struck me is that many of them contain a judgment embedded in them, which is another thing to avoid when having an argument or a discussion with your spouse or significant other.  The last thing you want to do is blame or speak with a statement dripping with judgment.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Stever Calechman, Fatherly.com
Royalty free photo courtesy of Unsplash.com