Many people don't realize until they are going through it, the extreme stress that the divorce process creates for the parties. Other than the death of a child or spouse, getting divorced can be one of the most horrific times of a person's life. This stress is guaranteed to last for several months and for some, years, depending on whether the parties go through a litigated and highly contested divorce or choose an alternative method with a more holistic approach, such as Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. Having to appear in the Courthouse; going into a Courtroom; and being addressed by a Judge who now has control over your life and your children is extremely scary and stressful for most people. This is why using Collaborative or Mediation is extremely helpful in alleviating much of the stress caused by the Court System. In both Collaborative Divorce and Mediation the parties never have to personally go to Court; only their paperwork goes to the Courthouse to get processed. That is a big difference and it alleviates a tremendous amount of stress for the parties.
Even under the best of circumstances, the dissolution of a marriage or a significant life partner relationship has inherit stress and has highly charged emotional aspects. Even when you are choosing a holistic approach, stress is involved. That is why using the Collaborative method is so beneficial. One of the members of the professional team is a mental health specialist who acts as a family specialist or divorce coach, helping guide the couple and navigating through difficult communication.
This article highlights different tips that you can take on how to help yourself through the stress. One being getting a therapist or a divorce coach that you can use as a sounding board and help you navigate some of the difficult issues. Getting organized, making a plan, doing your homework and finding out about the different processes available to you, other than costly litigation, well before you choose to take those first steps towards getting divorced. Most people feel much better when they get organized and have a plan of action. Just taking small baby steps of getting information can help you feel more grounded and help you organize and choose a better path going forward.
I feel taking positive action towards moving forward in a positive way are some of the biggest steps that you can take to help alleviate stress and help support yourself through an extremely difficult time.
Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Karen Covy of Your Tango Blog; Photo courtesy of UNSPLASH/TRENT SZMOLNIK.